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Tight Schedules, High Adrenaline

Tight Schedules, High Adrenaline

Man in pink pineapple print dress walking a yellow bike

Location: Tampa, Florida

“You should get some more rest,” my dad said as I yawned for the third time during the car ride.

I swatted away his concern. “I’ll be fine. I’ll go to sleep earlier.”

Of course, that didn’t happen. I ended up staying awake late into the night, packing and getting stuff ready and making sure that my schedule could work out for the next leg of the trip. I also realized that I’d forgotten my contact lenses at my friend’s house and spent an hour rabbit-holing into some influencer drama, [1] so not all of it was completely productive. [2]

Finally, at 12:30 AM, I fell into a strange, hazy dream involving my high school best friend, the color yellow, and a fancy hotel that I’d been shooting at a few days ago. [4]

Ah, vacation — where sleep schedules are thrown out the window, unhealthy food/drinks are consumed, and reasonably poor decisions (such as driving from West Palm Beach to Orlando with only a short stop at my dad’s in Tampa) are made, all in the name of fun and relaxation.

While bloggers’ Instagram feeds (mine included) certainly make travel vacations look fun and relaxing, the truth is that there’s often a lot of logistical anxiety behind it. On this trip, I felt like I was often behind or near-behind schedule at all times; when mistakes were inevitably made, such as leaving much-needed contacts a three-and-a-half hour drive away, [3] I had unpleasant flashbacks of my mom chiding me for being disorganized. I haven’t eaten or slept nearly enough, instead allowing myself to run on the adrenaline of constantly being in pretty places with people I love.

I can’t deny, though, that it’s kind of thrilling to have this tight, anxiety-inducing schedule, to hop from place to place to place. It’s certainly not a sustainable way to live, and in no way am I advertising that one should live this way. I just know I’ll be more or less back to normal (read: the responsible sleep-and-nutrition-schedule, stretches-every-morning, does-an-honest-day’s-work version of myself) all too soon, so I’m going to indulge in the madness as long as I can. ♚


[1] I have a lot of thoughts on the Caroline Calloway tour incident, so stay tuned for another lengthy opinion post once I have some downtime in my schedule.

[2] I feel like I’m pretty good about staying on top of my work until I make the conscious decision to stay up past 10:30 AM. The later it gets, the more likely I am to fall into my unhealthy old habits of browsing obscure corners of the Internet and being entertained by petty social-media gossip.

[3] I don’t remember exactly what happened, but those elements stood out to me even as I woke up.

[4] Fortunately, I had a pair of backup lenses for incidents like these, so maybe I wasn’t as disorganized as I thought! I’m going back to West Palm Beach in a few days, so I can pick my original contacts up then.

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